In the short booklet, What the Bible Says about Divorce and Remarriage, Wayne Grudem studies the complicated topics and ethics of divorce and remarriage from a Christians perspective. What does Scripture say about marriage, divorce, and remarriage? Is divorce permissible? If it is permissible, then is remarriage also permissible? When counseling and caring for those facing divorce or remarriage, where do we find that balance between respecting the sacred institution of marriage and care for people in the midst of sin and suffering? Does Scripture provide clear guidance and every situation, or does it provide general guidance that needs to be applied to the various situations we find ourselves in? Grudem seeks to provide practical, biblical advice to those who are facing these tough questions.
“Finally, it is important for churches to establish programs or ministry practices that teach about and encourage strong marriages, and that also will provide counseling and help for couples who are going through difficult times in their marriages.”
Scripture is clear on God’s intent for marriage and his tender heart towards those genuinely seeking him when facing the questions of divorce and/or remarriage. Grudem advocates for expanding Paul’s statement “in such cases” to include additional, undefined reasons for divorce, such as abuse. This position seeks to care for those involved, especially victims, but taken too far could lead to justifying divorce for any reason. As a Biblical Counselor I find myself in the middle of the difficult questions that Grudem seeks to answer. The thing you learn first is that life is messy, and sin brings about heart-breaking brokenness. I found Grudem’s discussions on the various Scripture passages and ethics surrounding divorce and remarriage helpful and practical.
“It should be clear from the previous discussion, however, that God considers marriage to be a solemn, lifelong commitment, and only the most serious kinds of destructive misconduct (adultery or desertion) are counted as valid grounds for divorce in the teaching of the New Testament.”
My hope is that all marriages will be reconciled but I know this is not always the case. Sometimes, no matter how much one spouse pursues reconciliation, the marriage may still end in divorce. To ignore that reality is to ignore how sinful we can really be. Divorce should be never entered into lightly, but we should also not push people into dangerous situations or where there is no sign of repentance or remorse from sin. For those that have divorced for Biblical reasons, we should not continue their suffering unnecessarily by preventing remarriage. For those that have divorced and remarried for unbiblical reasons, we should encourage them to live righteously within the marriage they find themselves in currently.
“After such an extensive discussion of possible grounds for divorce, it is important to remember that God established marriage as a lifelong commitment (see Matt. 19: 3– 9; 1 Cor. 7: 10– 14).”
This book is a great resource for those facing the difficulties of divorce or remarriage or those walking with someone who is. I recommend this book for pastors, elders, biblical counselors as a great resource for what Scripture says about these topics. It has helpful sections to think through difficult situations where a clear direction is not apparent. Grudem has thoughtfully worked through the various Scriptures on divorce and remarriage and applied them to real situations. His analysis is Biblical and charitable to differing positions.
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What the Bible Says About Divorce and Remarriage By Wayne Grudem |
I received a free copy in exchange for my honest review. The opinions I express are my own and I was not required to write a positive review.